;05

I don't think it's always been my dream to be a rap or hip hop artist, but lately it seems thats all I'm interested in. Ludacris, Eminem, Xzibit, Asher Roth, NWA, Beastie Boys. Its all that plays on my iPod, even though I do listen to some Blink 182, Sum 41 and Avenged Sevenfold every now and again, hip hop is my main priority. And people seem to find it so weird, a guy like me listening to artists that do nothing but talk about sex, drugs and killing after the sex for drugs. It's not that they find it disgusting, considering most of my friends and even some of my family like to chill out and just vibe to some Eminem from time to time, its just considering my personality they find it... strange.

I've stated before, I wasn't the most popular kid outside of school. I kept to myself a lot really. Which I think is what starts the train of thought that there is no way a guy like me can love rap and hip hop so much. So when I come out from time to time, telling people how I can't wait to start laying down beats, spitting out my game, they stand there in such state of awkwardness and confusion. They think, or rather I know atleast one person [as of today] thinks that because I write a blog to vent my feelings, in real life I'm a pretty laid back guy with a short fuse for the masses of stupid people and just because I'm generally a normal person. I'm really your average joe with what many people would call a stupid pipe dream. But thats how all dreams start off isn't it?

Now I don't want to say I'm following in anybody's footsteps in attempts to join this rap game, but Eminem has even said that rap wasn't his initial dream. He was a late bloomer in the industry and has still managed to come out on top, placing second in the rap olympics and now becoming the proclaimed Greatest Rapper Alive. I'm not saying I'm going to come out on top and hope to do the same, but recognition will be most definite even if its just for the local community I'm known in. Even if my city is the only people who know me, asking me for my autograph because I'm locally famous. That's still big. And its recognition. And someday thats all I'll ever ask for. And someday, my friends who knew me, will continue to know me. Those who acted like they didn't know me, never will. Just like Ice Cube said;

"Those who were cool with me then before I made it, are still cool with me now. Those who were cool with me after I made it, will continue to pay."

Paraphrased of course, considering I lack the ability to find the direct quote. But just you wait, someday, I'm gonna be famous.

--Too Much Thought